Is the Concept of Having A Soul Mate Biblical?

Does the Bible speak about a believer having a soul mate? Is there someone that God has for each one of us? Is it biblical to have a soul mate?

Eve Made for Adam

Genesis 2:20-25 “But for Adam there was not found a helper fit for him. So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. Then the man said, ‘This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.’ Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.”

Adam named all of the animals but there was no one for Adam or “there was not found a helper for him.” Why did God create a helper for Adam? God said that it was not good that Adam should be alone (Gen 2:18) so God took a rib from Adam’s side and He took that rib and “made [it] into a woman and brought her to the man.” The word “made” is literally “built” so God built or made a woman suitable or perfect for the man and “brought her to the man.” God is still bringing men and women together because His idea is that we should not live alone and when Adam and Eve were joined, God created the institution of marriage. Marriage was never a creation of man but one that God ordained and created. Adam was told to leave his family which means that the man and really the woman are to leave their family for the purpose of creating a new family. This is why the parents of the new couple should never interfere in the new family and why Adam was told to leave and cleave to Eve. We could say that the man and the woman are to leave out of their affairs their parents ideas for their own family because many a divorce is caused by in-laws in interfering in their children’s family. That is sin to God.

Does Every Believer Have a Soul Mate?

Many believe that there is the perfect person that is their soul mate or the perfect match for them. Is there anything in the Bible that indicates that this is true? No, there is nothing in the Bible that reveals we are destined to marry a specific person and no other. Some Old Testament saints had prearranged marriages that were the will of God but these were isolated cases and for particular circumstances and for specific purposes and we cannot extrapolate or take these examples as something that God will do for us. It is very possible to marry the wrong person. For one thing, believers are commanded to not marry outside of the faith…that is they should not marry an unbeliever because God has said that we are not to be unequally yoked (2 Cor 6). Many have never followed this godly advice and have ended up in a marriage that God never intended for them to be in and heartaches resulted. No marriage is always better than a bad marriage but once a couple is joined, either believers or a Christian with a non-Christian, they are commanded to stay in that marriage until death do they part for we know that God hates divorce (Mal 2:16; Mark 10:7-9).

Marrying Your Best Friend

The best advice is to first become friends…best friends…and date at least a few months to a year before any talk about marriage is ever discussed. The way the man treats his mother, the way that he reacts around children, and the way he reacts to stress during difficult times reveals whether he will be a suitable mate for the woman. The man should become well acquainted with the woman and see how she also reacts to life in general. Does either the man or the woman attend a regular worship service? Does the potential spouse regularly read the Bible, pray, and bear the fruit that Jesus said that you will know them by (Matt 7:15-20)? These are extremely important factors when deciding to date someone, not to mention marrying them. A couple should become best friends first, they should receive biblical counseling as to whether they are compatible in their beliefs about child rearing, likes and dislikes, whether they even want children, where they want to live and multiple other factors that, if not addressed prior to marriage, could create considerable friction in the home and be cause for a divorce at a later time. The point is that a couple should first become best friends and if time and counseling show that this person is a good match, then they end up marrying their best friend.

The Two Become One

When God performed the first marriage ceremony, He said that the two shall become one flesh, so in a sense, the two souls (living beings) become one. The mystery of the union of husband and wife is like that of the church and Christ. Believers become one with Christ and just like a husband should be willing to die for His wife, Christ died for His bride so that they might be joined together for all eternity. They are no longer one, just as we are no longer one when we are joined with Christ. We become one with Him and this too is an eternal union which even death will not severe.

Conclusion

If you are single and looking for a godly mate, make sure to get Christian counseling or talk to your pastor about what he believes makes a suitable mate. There are so many hidden land mines in deciding to marry someone. Marriage is designed to be a lifelong relationship and one that is not intended only to make someone happy or satisfy the flesh…marriage is more than that. Marriage is a God-ordained institution that was created to be like Christ’s relationship with the Bride and both are to submit to one another in love and always regard the other as better than themselves. Marriage is a wonderful thing if you marry the right person. Does God have someone just for you? That depends upon whether you submit to Him, seek godly counsel, and do not marry outside of the faith. That is the best way to ensure that you find your “soul mate.”

Read more about Adam and Eve here: Adam and Eve Bible Story Summary

Resource – Scripture quotations are from The Holy Bible, English Standard Version® (ESV®), copyright © 2001 by Crossway, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

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